February 2010
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January 2010
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I have the best friends evar.
Yes. Evar.
Seriously.
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Michael C. Hall for Caragh →
Caragh, I don’t know if you found these in your searches, but here you go…
http://www.squarehippies.com/actors/2009/03/michael-c-hall-in-six-feet-under/
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That's what friends are for.
So today I had a somewhat unsettling conversation (understatement of the year) with my mom about how much time she has left to live. It’s all very up in the air right now. The doctors told her she should have been dead by now. Now they’re telling her well, maybe a few more years, but don’t count on it, get your shit in order.
We were talking about her little time line goals that...
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Love? Love is something else. It’s the weather being good every day,...
– Casanova
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Um, I'm starting to love that Radar thing on the...
rickyv:
I wonder if we call it a BLT because we’d feel bad asking for a “bacon sandwich.”
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Whoopsie...
Guy on TV: Blah blah blah middle class blah blah blah...
Me: And who is this guy?
Mom: The Vice President.
Me: ....Really?
Mom: Yeah.
How awful is it that I didn't recognize the Vice President of the United States? Seriously? I feel that I watch enough news on TV that I should recognize the main political figures. I stand corrected.
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Jersey Shore party at my house!
Mom: Her fake boobs are hanging out.
Me: I don't think she cares.
Dad: Hey, you know what they say... They're real if you can touch them!
Me: .........................BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
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Red flags are supposed to be a warning, right?
God damn it. No matter how many red flags I see, the only thing I can think of is “Gee, red sure is a pretty color.”
I’m assuming that as long as I keep setting myself up, someone will always be there to knock me down.
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The thing that offends me the most is every time I hear the word the N-word. Not...
– Louis CK.
I just want a shirt that has a rainbow and the words “swearing is the best!” with a little stick figure guy who looks adorable and then if you go under a black light the entire shirt is just covered in a wide variety of swear words, but definitely heavy on the ‘cunt’.
(via...
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Andrea and the terrible, horrible, no good, very...
So I have this serious problem where I always pick what’s worst for me in any given situation.
Andrea, you could stay at your current steady job of 6 years or jump ship for a company that may or may not fail within the next year just because you’re an emotional wreck and this new place will pay you a bit better. What do you do? You, of course, jump ship and then get fired four months...
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Boobs.
I would just like to point out to my incredibly limited audience on this thing that my Victoria’s Secret VSX sports bra makes my boobs look AMAZING.
That is all.
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Those who shun the whimsy of things will experience rigor mortis before death.
– Tom Robbins
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You should never hesitate to trade your cow for a handful of magic beans.
– Tom Robbins
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There is no such thing as a weird human being, It’s just that some people...
– Tom Robbins
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There are many things worth living for, a few things worth dying for, and...
– Even Cowgirls Get The Blues, Tom Robbins
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The highest function of love is that it makes the loved one a unique and...
– Jitterbug Perfume, Tom Robbins
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Disbelief in magic can force a poor soul into believing in government and...
– Tom Robbins
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We waste time looking for the perfect lover, instead of creating the perfect...
– Tom Robbins
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Oh, what's this? A survey? Yeah.
Rules: - Bold all of the following TV shows which you’ve ever seen 3 or more episodes of in your lifetime. - Italicize a show if you’re positive you’ve seen every episode of it.
24 7th Heaven ALF Alias American Gothic America’s Next Top Model Angel Arrested Development Babylon 5 Batman: The Animated Series Battlestar Galactica (the old one) Battlestar Galactica (the new one) Baywatch Beverly...
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O.o
Andrea: So, what did you do for New Years?
Overnight Guy: Oh, nothing. I had my kids.
Andrea: ...Kids?
Overnight Guy: Yeah.
Andrea: ...How many kids do you have?
Overnight Guy: Oh, three.
Andrea: ...How old?
Overnight Guy: 12, 10, and 6.
Andrea: Oh, um, have a good night.
Either he's a lot older than I thought he was, or he had kids when he was really young. Plus he's most likely divorced.
On the plus side, he has REALLY nice hands. And REALLY blue eyes. And he smells good. Just sayin'...
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a golden eagle dressed in a red hat stops at our doorstep with a glass tumbler...
– Paula
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Humanity has advanced, when it has advanced, not because it has been sober,...
– Still Life With Woodpecker, Tom Robbins